4 months old!!

The boys turned 4 months old a few days ago. I'm having so much fun with them and watching them grow has been a blast. Preston rolled over from tummy to back a few weeks ago and has started imitating and blowing raspberries! Ethan talks up a storm and gives the biggest smiles ever. Both Preston and Ethan are bringing things to their mouths and can grasp rattles, teething toys, ect. They both love their playmat and I love watching them try to figure out how things work. Last week, they started watching Baby Einstein DVD's. I only allow one a day. I am amazed at their attention spans...they will sit and watch the entire DVD and both show excitement and kick their legs at different times during the show. It's so fun! Here are a few 4 month pictures. It was a bit of a challenge to get them to smile since they were both sick at the time they were taken.

~Preston~

~Ethan~

~Grouchy babies~

~I love how Preston is checking his little brother out~

~ The boys intently watching Baby Einstein~

Two days after the boys turned 4 months old was the one year anniversary of my embryo transfer. Here is a picture of the 4 embryos that we used...I'm so thankful that 2 of them decided to stick!!

3 months old!!

My babies are three months old! I can't believe how quickly time flies. I adore my little blessings and am trying to cherish every little moment amidst all the craziness that is life with twins!

~Preston~

~Ethan~

Baby Dedication

Last Saturday, we had Preston and Ethan dedicated at our church. It was quite a beautiful day, but an emotional one as well. The boys were dedicated in the chapel, the very same room that Karissa's memorial service was held in. When I found out that the dedication was going to be held in the chapel, I thought, 'how on earth am I gonna get through this one?" The thought that we were going to celebrate two new precious lives in the same place that we had celebrated the short life of a vibrant little 3 1/2 year old was mind-blowing. I simply could not wrap my mind around it.

Meeting with the pastor a few days before the dedication, I mentioned to him that it was gonna be a tough day for me and that I didn't know how I was going to hold it together. He told me that he wanted me to focus not on what happened in that room (Karissa's memorial service) in the past, but what we were going to be celebrating on that very day, the day the boys' would be dedicated.

All week leading up to the dedication, I reflected upon his statement. As I thought about what he had said, I was reminded of how Mark is always telling me to "live in the moment." I decided that the only way I was going to get through the dedication was to focus on the purpose of the day and to live by Mark and our pastor's words of advice. It wasn't a day to mourn the loss of Karissa or think about the memorial that took place in that room 2 1/2 years ago. It was Preston and Ethan's very special day. I, in no way, wanted to take away from their special day, from their special moment and the excitement that surrounded that day. I was determined to focus on what we were there for and to be present in the moment.

What brought tears to my eyes though, was all the love and support that surrounded Mark and I and how faithful God has been to us. The tears kept coming as I thought of the purpose of that day...we were there to dedicate the lives of Preston and Ethan back to God. They are His children.

Here are a few pictures from the dedication. We had a celebration with family and close friends afterwards, but unfortunately, we didn't take any pictures of that, except for the cake.

~My two little loves~

~Preston and I~

~Grandma Booth and Ethan~

~My Mom and I with the boys~
~The Dedication~

~Grandma Ashley holding Ethan & Grandma Booth holding Preston during
the prayer~

~The Family (with quite a few people missing)~

2 month pictures

~Preston~

~Ethan~

Preston and Ethan's First Christmas

Guess I'm a little late. We took a ton of pictures during the Christmas season. Christmas was a blast with our new babies. We were filled with so much joy, especially after going through 2 Christmases without Karissa. Here are a few...

~Our Christmas Tree~

~Our stockings hung on the mantle~

~Karissa's Tree~

~Cute Christmas Butts~

~4 generations of Ashley men!~

_______________________________

The pillow shown in the following 3 pictures was made by my sister. Every month we will take a picture of the boys next to the pillow as a fun way to see how much they've grown from month-to-month.

~Preston~

~Ethan~

With twins, it all flies out the window!

As I sit here writing this, I have two screaming babies, both in their swings and in their separate rooms. I'm about ready to lose my sanity, which is why I'm just letting them 'cry-it-out.' I have twins, don't judge me. I was never a believer in the idea of letting your child 'cry-it-out.' I also despised pacifiers, bottles and formula.

Before Karissa was born, I was adamant about not giving her a pacifier or formula. I never bought a pacifier and she never had one single taste of formula. Giving her a bottle, of pumped breast milk of course, was pushing it. I intended to do the same with the twins, but it became quite apparent to me, very quickly in fact, how much different things are with 2 newborns.

I had every intention of exclusively nursing the twins. I was heartbroken when our Lactation Consultant, whom we met with on various occasions, said that I would need to supplement with formula to get the boys' weights back up. They had each lost more than 10% of their birth weight and my body wasn't making enough milk yet to nourish two babies. We followed a crazy feeding schedule for a few weeks and finally got to stop the formula once they had gained weight.

But...as much as I despise formula, I still use it. Life with twins is beyond crazy and formula is now my sanity saver, as I prefer to call it!! And, quite honestly, I don't really feel like sitting around all day long nursing either. I don't really give them all that much, maybe 4 oz max/day, so, I guess I'm not doing all that bad. Oh, and pacifiers are lovely little devices too! Now, I'm off to nurse a baby or two.

9 years

Yesterday, Mark and I celebrated our 9 year wedding anniversary! Originally, we had planned to stay at home, but Mark's parents offered to watch Preston and Ethan...yay for another date night!!! Over a fabulous dinner, we reflected upon how much we have been through over the past nine years. It has been quite an interesting journey, one filled with much joy but A LOT of heartache. I am so thankful to be married to a man that has stuck by my side through the good, the bad and the unimaginable. I am quite certain that many marriages wouldn't have survived after the loss of a child, battling depression and dealing with infertility. I cannot imagine going through all of life's up's and down's without my husband and without Christ as the center of our marriage. I am so thankful and blessed.